![]() ![]() Instead, simply affirm the person as they speak by nodding and using verbal cues like, “Uh-huh,” “mm,” and “that makes sense.” If they pause and are looking for feedback, try mirroring a few words or phrases to keep it going. With this technique, less is more, though, as you don’t want to turn it into the copycat game you played in elementary school. Mirroring is the most basic version of reflective listening, as you simply repeat the main words or last sentence the speaker spoke, kind of like you would if someone was speaking, got distracted, and then asked, “Where was I?” ![]() ![]() Knowing the differences between them can help you get started and grow in your reflective listening, though. The line between these two techniques is blurry, so you’ll likely start to see them as more of a spectrum than separate practices as you use them. There are two main ways to practice reflective listening: mirroring and paraphrasing. When you’re able to listen effectively, you’re able to understand more fully, deepening your empathy and relationship with the person you’re listening to. No matter how invested you are in a conversation it can be difficult to stay fully engaged and focused, especially when someone else is doing the majority of the sharing.īecause of this, using reflective listening techniques can help you track what they’re saying and prevent your mind from wandering or from focusing on what you’re going to say next. Just as many people journal in order to get their thoughts where they can physically see them and make them easier to sort through, reflective listening allows speakers to physically hear their thoughts and feelings so that they can do the same thing.Īs the listener, sometimes paraphrasing what they said can help them hear themselves and fully identify the emotion or problem they’re struggling with. It allows the speaker to get distance from their thoughts. This is a perfectly healthy way to process, so being someone who will let them do this without trying to fix or redirect their ideas is valuable. By saying what they’re thinking about out loud, their thoughts can flow, allowing the person to begin to make a decision, find a solution, or find emotional relief. Many people are wired to process verbally instead of processing internally. Using this technique instead of asking questions or talking about yourself also shows that you’re still engaged and that you want them to continue talking. By reflecting on what the speaker shared back to them, they’ll feel that you really are listening and that you understand what they’re trying to say. There is power in feeling like someone truly hears you. Reflective listening is important for several reasons. It’s also different from asking the speaker questions, as that guides them instead of simply hearing them out and allowing them to process their thoughts and feelings as they flow. This is different from other conversations where you might listen to the speaker and then respond by adding in new information or a related anecdote. It also includes any emotions they’re expressing.Īs a reflective listener, your goal is to help the speaker hear their own thoughts and encourage them to keep talking. The message includes more than just the words the speaker communicates. Reflective listening is the practice of repeating a paraphrased version of the speaker’s message back to them. Reflective listening should be non-judgmental and without unsolicited advice. ![]() You can perform reflective listening either through mirroring or paraphrasing. It also has the added benefit of allowing the speaker to better process their thoughts and feelings. Reflective listening helps the speaker feel heard. Reflective listening is the act of processing what the speaker has said and repeating back their idea, which includes both thoughts and feelings. Ironically, one of the most important parts of effective communication is effective listening, and there are many techniques for doing this well. However, it’s vital to building and maintaining relationships, solving problems, and even accomplishing tasks in and outside of the workplace. There is a reason why people spend four or more years of higher education studying communication techniques and theories, and it’s because effective communication is a difficult skill to master. ![]()
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